Turning Point
by Syvan Coyne

-=Part One=-

3:30 a.m.
Xavier's Mansion

"NNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!"

Rogue bolted straight up in her sleeping bag. Panic stricken, she fought the zipper, finally just ripping it apart. Scrambling from the bag, her chest heaving, she barely made it to the open window before her stomach heaved and emptied itself as violently as a volcano errupting. The cool air helped to finally calm her stomach and she brought her head back into the room and sank slowly to the floor resting her pounding head against the wall. Pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around her legs she felt the stream of tears run down her cheeks. She didn't try to stop them. The tears turned to sobs torn from her gut. "Oh Lordy, Remy ah'm so sorry."

It had been another nightmare. They were always basically the same. She and Remy would be laughing and happy and then this dark cloud would cover the sky above them. Everything would change and she would suddenly be both scared and angry at the same time. She would start yelling at Remy and crying and accusing him of things that didn't make sense. Like telling him he had promised to love her forever but had deserted her anyway. Then she was crying because she said he didn't hold her anymore or kiss her and tell her that he loved her. If she questioned what she said there was always a bright flash of light like lightning and then Sinister would start laughing from somewhere she couldn't see and suddenly Remy was gone and Sinister would be standing where Remy had been. Suddenly she would be surrounded by Morlocks calling her a murderer. She would feel Sabretooth slash his claws across her body and see blood on her hands. Then she would look up and they would be in the Antarctic and Remy was dead but he still called to her and begged for her help. This time though she thought her dream would be different because instead of turning her back on him, she did go to him and kissed him and he was alive again and she was so happy. But then he laughed, and it was Sinisters laugh. His face twisted and though he looked like Remy his skin was pale white and he had a red diamond on his forehead. He told her that she was a fool. That she knew far too much and he was going to have to kill her so no one else would know all his secrets. She begged with Remy not to do it. To fight Sinister, but he just laughed again and called her a foolish child. Always going where others led. She felt Remy's hands push her backwards and she fell into the charred remains of the underground fortress where the trial took place. Some of the other X-Men were there but they couldn't help her. They were all tied or chained to the walls. Then Remy/Sinister started burying her in ice and dirt. It got heavier and heavier and she couldn't breathe. The last thing she remembered before waking up was hearing Remy's voice saying "I love you chere."

3:45 a.m.
Kitchen at Xavier's Mansion

"This is the third night in a row. We must do something to ease the child's pain." Storm said to the occupants sitting sporadically around the large eat-in kitchen. She looked at those sitting around the kitchen in varying degrees of wakefulness and dress. She met Logan's eyes, saw knowledge and a small amount of censure. Storm turned her attention to Betsy and Warren. "Is there anything either of you may have remembered to help us?"

Sitting on the counter-top Logan ignored the question knowing that for the time being they weren't going to learn anything new and focused his attention on Storm. He wondered if she intentionally called the rest of them "child", "girl", "boy" or "little one", whenever she was worried, upset or trying too hard to be the leader. Logan saw Warren's feathers ruffle with agitation. Storm was ticking him off. Logan couldn't help but smile just a bit. Warren's bitterness was likely blinding him from something that happened down in the Antarctic. Someone was going to have to push past his wall and make him face things. Normally, that job would have been his own, but, Storm appeared to want to take Warren on. Logan also sensed that part of the reason was because of her own sense of guilt at refusing to allow any of them to go searching for the Gumbo. As far as he was concerned, Storm had made a wrong decision. His own personal feelings didn't come into the equation. Gambit was an X-Man. He had fought beside them, covered their backs and taken hits for all of them. End of story as far as he was concerned. Each and everyone of them had done things in their pasts that haunted them. It was because of the X-Men that most of them had received a second chance to make something better of themselves. Remy had proven himself, and deserved the support and consideration of the team.

With his own mind made up. Logan hopped off the counter and started for the door. "Logan, we are not done here. Where do you think you are going?" Storm demanded.

God he hated it when she used that imperious tone of voice with him. "The rest of ya can sit around and talk until the ice age comes again if ya like. Me, I remember when bein' an X-Man meant bein' willin' to die for each other. When if one of us didn't come home, none of us did. I'm going after a lost team mate."

Thunder boomed and shook the house. "I have forbidden any rescue attempts Logan...."

"Gggrrr.....stand down Storm, you don't want ta go where yer headin' darlin'."

"Don't force me to discipline you Wolverine. As leader of the X-Men I refuse to allow you..."

"I go, where I want to go 'Ro, don't ever think otherwise. I ain't some snot nosed kid who needs motherin' or who's gonna stand around bein' used in some form of petty revenge because my feelin's are hurt." He glared at Storm, daring her to either continue or deny what he had said. He didn't know where the accusation had come from but suddenly he felt that he had hit the nail on the head. It seemed so clear now, why Storm had refused to allow the search party, and to an extent why she felt the need to support her decision so strongly. She was as angry as Warren was bitter. He waited for her response.

Everything was silent. Not one person moved as Storm and Logan faced off. No one was having trouble staying awake either. All gazes were riveted on the tall, regal looking leader and the extremely ticked Canadian. The thunder was growing stronger and lightning flashed in near blinding intensity. "Do you dare to suggest that I would leave Remy out to die in the Antarctic out of spite?!?" Ororo demanded in both rage and shock.

"Yup."

The crack of thunder was deafening, the lightning bolt that hit just outside the kitchen window, shattered the glass sending it scattering accross the floor. "HOW DARE YOU?!?! I was the one who brought him to the X-Men, he saved my life....he's my friend."

"And finding out that he was involved with the massacre of the Morlocks and in part responsible for the injuries that took Warren's wings and nearly killed Collosus, Kurt and Kitty was like bein' kicked in the gut by a mule. It's more than that though ain't it. You were hurt that he didn't tell YOU. You've been a bit jealous ever since he started chasin' Rogue. You were his friend but, she's his heart 'Ro. That's why yer sittin' here discussin' options instead of doin' what ya know would help both Rogue and Remy. There's a part of you that wants ta see Rogue sufferin' isn't there? You wanted her to feel hurt like you did when Remy turned more and more to her."

"SHUT UP!" Storm cried. Pointing one hand at Logan a wind whipped up and blew him through the kitchen doorway. Surprisingly there wasn't a crash or even a thud. Horrified, at her actions Storm pulled her hand in towards her body and stared at the doorway.

"Blowin' me outta the room doesn't change the truth does it 'Ro? Come on darlin', face it." Logan came back into the room and standing directly behind him was Rogue. There were tears running down her face leaving no doubt in anyone's mind that she had heard the accusations.

"NO! My reasons were based on facts. We are not in any condition to go after Remy. We have no way of getting there, or are you forgetting what Bastion did here? We were and still are not in any condition to go traipsing off to the Antarctic...and if Rogue had not left him.....and...why did he do it?...why didn't he tell me? ...Goddess forgive me." Storm ended in a quiet sob.

"Ah've been a fool. Ah've been so wound up in mah own problems and fears, feelin' sorry for mahself, that ah've continued ta let others lead me around by the nose. No more do ya heah me! Ah can't say ah understand what made ya do what ya did Storm, but ah'm the last one to be throwin' stones. Ah left the man ah love ta die. More damnin' though, ah let others direct mah life. Maybe that's why ah still don't know why ah did what ah did. Whether ah did it because of me or him or one of the other shadows in mah head. Ah do know that ah've got ta do somethin because it's the right thing ta do though. Ah'm goin' with Logan ta find a lost X-Man. The rest of y'all will have ta decide for yoahselves what ta do, but we ain't waitin' on y'all." Turning towards the Canadian X-Men she gave a watery smile and said "If ya can wait long enough foah me to change mah clothes anyway."

"Get movin' darlin', I'll be outside." Without looking back the two walked out of the kitchen.

"Don't let them shake you Storm. You made a difficult decision. They were just letting off steam." Betsy said quietly. "If it makes you feel any better, I'm sure Scott would have made the same call."

"You don't have to justify yourself Storm to them or anyone. Gambit used all of us. He was here under false pretenses. For all we know he could have been spying for Sinister. Heck he could have been working for Bastion. How else could that maniac have gotten in here so easily and taken everything. Look at all the pain and suffering and deaths he's responsible for. If he died out in the Antarctic I can only see it as justice being served for all those he hurt and never got the chance to find for themselves." Warren said with bitterness dripping from each word.

"This isn't the team, the family, ah've wanted to be a part of for so long. Ah thought bein' an X-Man would be the proudest time of mah life, but right now ah'm ashamed to be associated with y'all." Sam said angrily. " Warren you're one of the original X-Men. You're pathetic. You're an insult to everythin' the Professor ever wanted. Where would you be if'n the team turned their backs on you after you agreed ta let Apocalypse give ya your wings back? After the things you did you shouldn't be sittin' there lookin so smug and self-righteous. After the people you hurt, maybe we should have you killed off so that they can have justice."

"Shut up kid, you don't know what you're talking about. Besides I was under the influence of Apocolypse. I wasn't acting under my own thoughts."

"Ah can read just fine Mr. Hypocrite. The files that Hank, Scott and the Professor kept on ya. You were so wound up in your own despair ya tried to commit suicide. You sure didn't give a damn about the Morlocks then did ya? Just you. That seems to be a rather common trait in all your files ya know. Everything is always about you. So why don't ya answer this; if you were willing to die because ya didn't have your wings why did ya take Apocolypse up on his offer? And don't give any of this hogwash that you weren't thinking clear. What was the real reason? It was that you wanted something and he offered it to ya. Ya didn't care who gave it to you or what price you would have to pay afterwards. Just so long as YOU got what YOU wanted right then."

"Sam, leave him alone. You don't know the pain he was in. What was going through his mind." Betsy said sternly.

"So ah shouldn't question Warren Worthington III, because we don't know what was driving him, but y'all know exactly was driving Gambit to make the deal he made with Sinister right? And after all Gambit may have tried to stop the Marauders, but, he can't be trusted can he? He could still be working for Sinsiter, or tipping of Bastion, wasn't that what ya said Warren. Then again. Maybe you're not free of Apocolypse, and this is all your doing eh Warren."

"You have made your point Sam. Back off." Betsy said standing to face the newest X-Man.

"Why would ah do that? Warren was the one who turned this into an X-Files episode with conspiracies and spies and the like. While ah'm at it ah might as well remind everyone of your little traitor act shall ah. According to your boyfriend, you could just as easily be a candidate needing to be offed. After all, you were the one who convinced the others to go through the Seige Perilous when y'all were Down Under. You were the one who teamed up with the Mandarin and were willin' ta kill Wolverine and Jubilee. We only have your word that you were brainwashed. Why should we believe you and Warren but doubt Gambit?"

"I told everyone what had happened to me. I didn't keep secrets that affected the team to myself." Betsy said defensively.

"Like ya told everyone right away about the bionic eyes that Mojo gave ya? Like how Mojo and Spiral were able to see everything you saw, including passwords to the computer files, access codes to the danger-room and the war room and to Cerebro?" The quiet, unasuming boy from Kentucky stared down the Ninja woman. He had never felt so angry. He couldn't believe the things he was saying. Somehow though it was like a dam had been broken in his head and all the things he had held back and would never have said out loud before were finally finding a voice. He realised that part of it was because he hadn't looked at the X-Men as real people before with failings and short-comings. He had made them less than human and more than human at the same time. He made them icons in his own mind. With this incident happening with Gambit and then the confrontation between Logan and Storm, he had finally shattered the hero worship in which he had held the X-Men and was now able to voice his opinion as an equal. He found himself looking at Storm. They hadn't been getting along very well lately either. Mostly over a difference of opinion about Marrow staying.

"I know what you wish to say Samuel. That I too am a hypocrite. That I was no innocent before coming to the X-Men. That I was a thief, and pick-pocket. That I have been under the thrall of the Shadow King and also done things to hurt my fellow teammates. I have hurt and even killed and never answered to anyone else's justice. That I have allowed my own personal beliefs and emotions overrule my logic and leadership responsibilities. That all of us" She shook her head and said again "That I, have taken things at face value and not bothered to discover their validity. That once my feelings were hurt I selfishly turned my back on those who needed my leadership and caring."

Even though Storm was now being brutally honest with the others and herself Sam found he could not show her any compassion just yet. Just as honestly, he nodded his agreement of her assessment of herself. He found he couldn't soften his attitude. If he did so right now, he felt he would be lessening the magnitude of the honesty that had finally been brought forth for all of them. They all needed to face the darkness so that they could achieve a turning point in their lives. He knew with his own feeling of equality with the X-Men he had reached his own turning point and he saw the direction he was going to take. Heading for the door he said "Ah don't expect any of y'all to come with me. And the things ah said weren't intended to force ya to do something you don't feel is right; but ah've got to follow mah own judgement. Ah'm gonna try and catch up to Rogue and Logan."

Feeling drained and incredibly tired, Storm looked at the people in the kitchen. Beast, Maggot, Cecilia, Warren, Betsy and herself. Marrow, thank the Goddess had been in hiding down in the danger room and had never joined this impromptu session. "Hank?" Ororo asked simply.

"'There but for the grace of God go I.' Rather fitting at this juncture do you not think? Although, I have always been of a mind that a rescue team should have gone after our little black sheep, I am personally unable to relocate at this time. I find my priorities must keep me here for the time being. I have been in contact with Moira and she has discovered a rather interesting theory for the Legacy Virus. I will though, put together a medical kit - such as it will be - for those who are going asearching." Hank also headed for the door.

"I don't know this Gambit from a hole in the ground, but I still find myself shocked that you abandoned him." Cecilia said to Storm in her straight forward, rather brash manner."I would offer to go myself to maybe give medical attention if it was needed but I don't have the proper equipment or clothing. I feel I would be more of a hinderance than any real help. Maybe I can be of better assitance by trying to get an emergency room set up here for when they get back. I still have a few friends who might be able to get me a few supplies." She was nearly out of the door when she heard Warren say "She would be willing to help someone who is no better than a murderer. Where was she when the Morlocks were dieing, when my wings had to be amputated?" Swinging around she looked Warren in the eyes and replied "Yes, I would do everything to save him if it was within my power to do so. Even if he were a mass murderer with blood still on his hands. You see I took and oath. An oath that means something to me. Regardless of whether someone is good or bad, white or black, human or mutant. My first priority is the preservation of life. Maybe that which you live your life doesn't mean as much to you. I was under the belief that your Professor Xavier was willing to give anyone a second chance and always preached for peace and understanding. Perhaps you were sick that day and missed that class huh?"

"You're telling me that if Adolph Hitler was brought into this house seriously wounded you would fight to save his life. Even though you know what he was responsible for. That if you did save him what he could be capable of doing again?" Warren sneered.

"Yes I would try to save him.."

"That would make you just as guilty as him of anything he did afterwards." Warren shot at her.

"No, I disagree. You see, I am not a judge, jury or executioner. I am a doctor. I do not decide who I should help based on what they look like or what their name is, but based on the severity of injury. If I see a white person carrying racist literature and they come into the hospital with injuries from being beaten, should I let that person perhaps die, because I find their beliefs repugnant? What about if the person or people who did the beating were brought in having been beaten by others or perhaps injured by police who were trying to stop the original beating? What about the those who got involved after the fact, if they were hurt should I let them die because they came to the aid of a racist? Do you see? Once something like that starts where does it stop. Where does the line get drawn? What about a child molester or a wife beater. Is one worse than the other? Are they the same as a cold blooded killer or serial rapist? What if it was the first time for any of them and done while stoned or drunk. What if it happened because of a reaction to medication? Should the doctor then also be held accountable? This country has a judicial system where a group of "peers" decide whether the actions of another need to be punished or not. It may not be infalible but it sure as hell beats individual justice. Maybe you should think about that a bit longer Mr. Worthington. After all, from what the boy said your past isn't that bright. Whether or not you were being controled by another probably wouldn't matter to the family of those you hurt." Dr Reyes turned again and this time didn't stop.

"I admit I may be giving my anger too much free reign and that I have been too quick to judge Gambit's involvement with Sinister and Bastion, but, I can't forgive or forget what Gambit cost me. I don't want to influence anyone else though, so I'll be leaving." Warren glanced at Betsy. He didn't say anything to her trying to make it clear he didn't want to influence her decision. He also walked from the kitchen.

"What hurts Warren, hurts me. I had sensed Sinister's influence on Gambit before, and perhaps I too am judging him unfairly, but, since we seem to be choosing sides between Gambit and Warren, I stand with Warren. I truly hope Gambit is innocent or that there is at least more to his past than we yet know, but I cannot be a part of finding him." With that Betsy also left the kitchen.

"What you be doing pretty lady?" Maggott asked Storm.

"I know I should make ammends by leading the others to find Remy. But, I cannot leave the mansion and those of you with no training without protection. My place is here."

"Ach, I guess I can't let you stay all lonely now can I. The girls and I will keep you company huh?"

Storm and Maggott also rose from the table and left the kitchen. Closing her eyes briefly, Storm sent out a prayer "Please Goddess, keep him safe and let him know how deeply I regret my actions."

6:00 a.m.
Outside New York State

Just past the New York state line Cannonball finally caught up to Rogue, who was carrying Logan. "Y'all mind some company?" He asked solemnly.

A small smile crossed Logan's face as he said "Somehow I knew you would be along Sam. You're a strong man."

Feeling a bit sheepish and embarrassed by the praise Sam said "It only took gettin' mah head knocked straight for me to catch on though."

"Then yoah in good company sugah. 'Pears we all needed a little wake up call. We all been gettin so used to just followin' orders we've stopped making decisions for ourselves. Least y'all have a reason foah what ye did. Still comes down to the fact that ah'm the one who left him there." Stubbornly she refused to cry again. Tears didn't help anything and besides she'd cried more in the last year than she had in her whole life. It was another aspect of herself she didn't understand. She'd never been a mushy cry baby before. "No one else willing to come along huh?" Rogue asked Sam feeling angry and bitter.

"Well not in body but some in spirit anyway." Sam indicated the pack he was carrying. "Beast put the medical supplies together. He said to tell ya he would have come if not for Moira needing his help with the Legacy Virus just now. He said he feels there is more to Gambit's story than we know right now. 'Specially since it was "Erik the Red" who brought it all out. He said to tell ya that he feels the whole thing was fishy from start to finish with the trial. He doesn't doubt what you absorbed from Remy but he's got some theory on that as well that he'll discuss later. It was only Dr. Reyes coming up that finally stopped Hank from giving me more instructions. She told him ta stop babblin'. Then she told me she would have come to help however she could but she doesn't have the proper clothes and didn't feel her powers would be of much help. So she thought she would try and call in a few favours and set up an ER in case we need it when we come back with Gambit."

"What about 'Ro?" Logan asked.

"She asked me to tell ya both that she's sorry. Y'all were right and she will try her best to make ammends, but right now her priorities have to keep her at the mansion but her prayers are with us." Sam looked at Logan who simply nodded in acceptance. Rogue didn't make any type of acknowledgement. Sam shut up and the three X-Men settled in for a long flight to the Antarctic.

2:00 p.m.
Antarctic

"Split up and find him. He can't survive much longer out here. And I'm not done with him yet." Sinister sneered. Quickly, Sinisters lackies spread out and started their search.

"You may not t'ink you finished with me. But I'm definitely finished wit' you." Replacing the ice slab that covered his underground cave, Remy Lebeau charged another group of stones and rocks and let them release the kinetic energy slowly to give off heat. In the closed off cave it was enough to keep him from freezing to death. He was going to have to go back to the underground compound though and try and find some food again and something that he could burn for heat. He had found some tarp, a mattress from one of the cells and even some blankets in his first rummage through the wreckage left by Erik the Red. He couldn't help but remember Rogue's words to him as she had left him. 'That looking after himself was what he seemed best at.' "You're wrong chere. It appears I'm best at losing de t'ings that mean the most to me. I'm not goin'to give up though. I'm goin' to find a way ta prove mahself to you. I will win your love again chere. I swear it."

Continued in Chapter 2.

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