Some of the conversation between Bobby and Hank
was taken out of Pinky and the Brain. I dunno, I always thought the
two pairs of friends were so much alike. ::Whistles the theme from
Pinky and the Brain::
Disclaimer: Hank, Remy, Bobby, and Trish are Marvel's. David
is mine. No money involved.
Some Assembly Required
by Lee Tybird
"David! Stop playing with my chemistry equipment!" Hank
McCoy cried from the doorway of his lab. He'd caught his ten-month-old
son in his lab for the third time that week. "Those aren't toys!"
David gave a smile and clapped his hands.
"No, Son. Stop!"
David knocked over another vial of chemicals.
Hank rushed over and picked David up. "Let's get you cleaned
off," he said. He rushed David off to the bathroom. "I don't
understand you. I tell you to stop, and you insist on playing with
my work. I should make a translator or something that would aid us
in raising you," Hank commented. He sighed and looked at his
son. "Why can't you be telepathic?"
David just tilted his head.
Hank took a wash cloth, wet it under the sink, and began to wipe
the multicolored liquid off his son. "You've never shown an interest
in my work before, so why are you so interested now?" he asked.
"Is it the colors, the smells?"
David just stared.
"Sometimes I wonder about you," said Hank. "David,
you have got to learn to control your need to get into certain things.
Like Daddy's Legacy research. It's very important that you keep out
of that and let the big people handle it."
David only blinked. He grabbed hold of the wash cloth and began to
Hank sighed. "Trish!" he called. "Do you understand
"No," Trish replied from down the hall. "But I think
it's cute the way they get into things. Everything seems so new to
"Baby troubles, Hank?" asked a voice from the door of the
Hank glanced over to see Bobby Drake. "I suppose. You're an
undeveloped male, Robert, why do you think David keeps getting into
Bobby glared at Hank. "I am NOT undeveloped!" he protested.
"Anyway. I think he's doing it to get your attention. I think
he wants to be like you, and he wants you to know that."
"A possibility," Hank replied. "But quite unlikely.
If he wanted to be anything like me, he would have gone straight for
Bobby sighed. "He's a baby, Hank. He doesn't know what those
"You're right. Still, I wish he'd stay out of my lab."
"Maybe it's the fact that you're always in there?"
Hank stayed silent. "You may have a point, dear Robert."
"Don't I always?"
Hank shook his head. "No." Hank looked down at David, who
stared back. "Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Bobby?"
"I think so, Hank," Bobby replied, looking up in thought.
"But how the hell should I know where baby oil comes from?"
Hank turned to Bobby. "You are an idiot."
Bobby gave an irritated smirk. "It was a joke, genius."
"I know I am," Hank replied. "Come, there is much
work to be done."
Hank picked David up off the counter, and walked to his room. He
set him down in the play pen.
Bobby followed. "What are you gonna do?"
Hank turned around. "I'll explain on the way to the store."
Three Hours Later...
"Dis one goes here."
"No it doesn't, it goes on the other side."
"Uh-uh, mes amis, look at de instructions."
"Remy, it goes here!"
"Remy tellin ya, it goes here."
"Will you two cease your arguing and let me do it?" asked
Bobby, Hank and Remy were in the process of assembling a play pen
near the computer in Hank's lab. Remy and Bobby were having a rather
hard time getting it together. The agreement was that Remy and Bobby
would try to put it together without Hank's help, but if they failed,
Hank would step in and do it. It was a matter of pride.
Hank respected that, but was getting impatient. He had a lot of work
to do, and wanted to get started.
"Uh-uh," Bobby said. "One last shot, Hankster."
"You said that an hour ago, if I do so recall," Hank replied.
"Now, move over and let me do it."
Remy sighed. "Fine. Be dat way."
They got up, and Hank sat down. He had it assembled the rest of the
way ten minutes. "There. That's better."
David lay asleep in his new play pen. Hank looked over from his computer
at his son. He got up and glanced around, spotting the fire blanket.
He grabbed it, and placed it gently over David. Hank walked back to
his chair and sat down. He continued to type. As he did so, he began
to hum a lullaby.
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