(un)frozen

Bobby belongs to Marvel. Charlotte belongs to me. No profit. Feedback worshiped.
An extremely silly piece of work, brought on the the hazards of dieting in a potlucking world.


The Last Piece
by Kerri

"Drop it, Drake!"

"Oh, come on, it's the last one."

"I know it's the last one, I put my name on the box."

"I'll get you another one, I promise."

"No way. You want more, you go get your own."

"Pul-leeeeeeaassssee?!"

"Whining doesn't work on me, snowball. Do you know what I had to do to save that one piece?"

"We all know what you did, we could hear you half the night, and Logan the other half. Why are you up so early, anyway? I thought you'd still be worn out from earning this."

"I remembered we're out of milk, and I went to get some. Now, drop it or I drop you."

"There's no milk?"

"There's still no milk, as far as you're concerned. Now put down my piece of chocolate satin pie, and I'll let you walk normally for today."

"Jeez," he grumbled, setting the plate down on the table, "after all that noise I'd think you'd be in a better mood in the mornings. Maybe someone should have a talk with Logan."

"If you're feeling brave, give it a try, but I wouldn't do it if I were you." Charlotte gave him a self-satisfied smile and set down the grocery bag she'd carried in. "Not unless you have a wish to never father a child. He's not likely to enjoy anyone waking him up just now."

Bobby shuddered. "I'm not going up there. I like everything I have attached and in working order." He looked into the paper sack. "Hey, you've got whipped cream in here, and chocolate syrup." He pulled out a plastic bag. "And marshmallows?"

"Yeah?"

"What are you doing with all this stuff? Making ice cream sundaes?"

"Do you see any ice cream?"

"No." He delved down deeper. "Chopped nuts, maraschino cherries, butterscotch topping and the milk." He looked at her over the rim of the bag. "And you're willing to keep one little piece of pie away from a growing boy?"

"I sure am. This stuff is just for breakfast in bed."

"But won't that be stic...."

He didn't think it was possible. He'd lived here for years, the hazards of communal living should've cured him of every sexual innuendo possible, but he blushed. Scarlet.

"Oh, God, now I can't even think about breakfast," he groaned. "You old folks ought to calm it down and act your age. Set a good example for the younger kids."

Charlotte grinned wickedly at him. "Stuff some cotton in those ears," she drawled as she reloaded the bag. "Don't sweat it, kid. At least we're not out on the lake or up in the clouds like Warren and Betsy."

"Did you have to tell me that?"

"You didn't know?"

"I knew, but as long as I didn't have to hear about it, I didn't know."

"Bobby, you need to get out more. You don't even know what Scott and Jean are up to." She picked her purchases up and left the kitchen.

Just the thought - no, he told himself, let it go. After all, she left her pie right there on the table. That would console his tortured brain.

He reached for it just as her 'voice' caught him. <Put it down, or you will walk funny today.>

"Just putting it back in the fridge," he grumbled. "Jeez!"

End.


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