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"The Super Beings Bureau Saga"

Stories in this series

A series of short stories about the Super Beings Bureau, someplace all super-powered types have to visit at one point or another, and Ann Miller, a long-suffering, perfectly ordinary person who wants to be a super hero in order to help people.

A Hard Day's Work
Magneto returns to the Bureau for the annual renewal of his super-being license.

So You Want to Be a Superheroine
A perfectly normal, well-adjusted woman named Ann applies to be a superheroine.

What They'll Do for Love
Sick of all the hurdles shoved in their paths, Rogue and Gambit demand a marriage license.

Office Gossip
The hard-working folks at the Super Beings Bureau discuss the most recent events at the office.

What's a Super Heroine to Do?
Trying to "help" Ann become popular, the Bureau places her with Generation X.

What a Super Heroine Should Be
The people at the Bureau make one last-ditch attempt to show Ann how to be a super heroine.

Power Hungry
Trapped in the office for nearly 2 weeks during a power outage, the folks at the Bureau -- and the long-suffering super beings who just came to renew their licenses -- must endure hunger, boredom and each other.

Effects
Clients of the Bureau visit the dentist. <Shudder>

A Super Heroine's Life
Ann Miller and Ms. Marvelous go on the Susan Smith Show to discuss their respective lifestyles as super heroines.

Ann Miller about Her Latest (blah-ish) Outing
While her frustrated Writer struggles to rewrite/revamp/redo/re-whatever Ann Miller's last appearance, Ann tells the folks at home what's going on.

Ms. Marvelous: The Early Years
(or: "So You Want to Be a Sleek Sex Goddess")
An intimate look at just how Ms. Marvelous got started in the superhero business.

Disclaimer: If you know it, it's Marvel's. If not, it's mine.
Oh my God! I just realized ... I'm addicted to sillyfic! < g >.



Magneto glowered at the man before him sourly. He hated these yearly excursions to the Super Beings Bureau, and unfortunately, his certificate had just expired.

Kyle Stone nodded at Magneto. "Name?" he inquired.

Magneto's teeth gnashed. After all the years that he'd been forced to come here to renew that licence, he'd have figured that the fools would have gotten his name. Hell, everyone should know who he was. Didn't the man read the paper, or watch tv?

"Magneto," he snapped, resisted the urge to cut off the blood supply to Kyle's head. 'If I do that, the whole process will have to start from scratch.'

"Magneto ... Magneto..." Kyle murmured, riffling through his file. "I thought that you were Joseph? He still has his licence -- it won't be needing renewal for another six months."

His mood darkened further at the mention of that personality-less imposter. "I don't know who Joseph is, but he is not me!"

Kyle waved about a piece of paper, "it says right here that Joseph is the mutant known as Magneto. And he already has his licence. We can't give a different licence to the same person."

"We are not the same person! I am Magneto! He is not! Get that through your thick skull already!" Dealing with mutant hating bigots wasn't as stressful as facing Kyle Stone.

"I'm sorry, I'm going to have to talk to my superior about this matter. Don't worry, she's a veteran from the Psylocke/ Revanche affair," Kyle stated calmly. "Please wait while I--"

'That's it! I've waited two hours already, no more!' Magneto rose from his uncomfortable chair and toward over Kyle magestically, finally giving into his temptation to cut off the man's blood flow. "I will not wait! Give me my licence -- now!"

"urp!"

Taking that for an agreement, Magneto let the younger man's blood continue it's journey to his brain. "Now why don't we proceed?"

Kyle winced slightly and nodded. "Villain with a master plan, Villain with a cause, hired gun, anti-hero, tortured hero, tortured villain, lone hero, group hero--"

Magneto glowered. "Just put whatever I had on my licence last time!"

Kyle glanced down at the laminated certificate. "Amnesiac hero?"

"Not Joseph's card! Mine!" he snapped.

"Well, you've had quite a few classifications in your time..."

Deep breath... Magneto carefully folded the edges of his cape, focusing his attention on that small matter so as to not loose all semblance of sanity and rip the annoying little man's body apart. "Villain with a righteous cause," he finally said.

"I'm afraid that 'righteous' isn't included in any of our -- eep!" Seeing Magneto's steely gaze, Kyle quickly changed his mind. "Righteous cause it is!"

A tense moment later, Kyle handed the documents to Magneto and showed him towards the photo area. As the man left, Kyle allowed himself a relieved sigh before getting ready for his next appointment.

He sat back down at his desk and straightened his tie before buzzing his secretary. "You can send Sinister in now."

 

End

 


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