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UXM #350 Aftermath

Stories by Northlight

On one bright, beautiful morning, the X-Men awaken to face their deadliest foe ever: bad hair.

"Inquiring Minds"
A mysterious figure decides to "tell all" about the secret lives of the X-Men in a bestselling book.

"Just in Time for Christmas"
Gambit is rescued in Antarctica -- by Santa Claus?

"Love and Pain"
Stuck in the "waiting room" between appearances in their respective series, Gambit and Angel (from Buffy the Vampire Slayer) compare notes on their respective problems.

"Reunions and Other Troubles"
The sequel to "Love and Pain," Gambit and Angel escape from Limbo and are reunited with their respective love interests.

"Maybe Just a Little Strange"
The true origin of Wolverine is revealed.

"Nothing More"
In response to Alara Rogers' challenge to kill off one's favorite character, Northlight writes her own version of Rogue's death as a result of Dr. Agee's "cure."

"Of Cooties and Dice"
Rogue, Jean and Storm get a little too involved in their board game.

"One of Those Days"
An evil villain attacks -- and so does Murphy's Law, as the X-Men suffer multiple "insignificant" inconveniences on their way to the battle.

Sitting on the roof, Rogue looks back on what really happened in Antarctica as she tries to avoid the other X-Men.

"Searching for Justice"
A man tries to seek justice for the death of his sister as a result of Dr. Agee's "cure."

A woman named Lindsey, with the unique power of appearing to be whoever someone else wants them to be, meets a frantic woman on the street and walks into another case of mistaken identity.

"Skin Crawl"
A unique take on Rogue's feelings toward her powers.

"Small Problems"
Rogue awakens to the incessantly annoying attempts of a misguided mosquito to get a morning snack.

Realizing the sheer stupidity of fighting in the dead heat of summer, Magneto and the X-Men decide to get slushies together. Since TheAudience still needs to be entertained, the PTB find replacements for the heroes and villain.

"Summer Vacation"
In a follow-up to "Substitutions," the X-Men prepare to go on a real vacation and leave their "replacements" in charge of the Mansion.

"That's What Happens"
Wondering about the practicality of Rogue's skimpy little outfit in UXM 353-4, Northlight writes her version of what could happen if Rogue's not careful...

"The Super Beings Bureau Saga"
A series of short stories about the Super Beings Bureau, someplace all super-powered types have to visit at one point or another.

"The Susan Smith Show"
A series of talk shows in which various super hero-types discuss the issues that affect their lives.

For someone like Rogue, the sense of touch can mean any number of things.

"Untitled Random Mutterings"
A series of vignettes in which Rogue deals with engagement, marriage, parenthood and growing older.

"Watching from a Distance"
We all know how the heroes feel. But how about their parents? This story is from Rogue's mother's perspective, as she watches her daughter grow up through news reports and newspaper headlines.


Web site: Northlight's Page

Notes: Just a bit of sillyfic for the holidays :) I suffered a great crisis before writing this thing -- I couldn't remember what Pole a certain someone lived in. Nor could I find 'The Night Before Christmas' (for research, you know). But I bravely continued anyhow :)
Disclaimer: Marvel's. Everybody's. Mine. You can figure out who goes with who on your own.

Even had the bone chilling wind not been blowing snow into his eyes, Remy would not have been able to see much better because of the tears forming in his eyes due to the extreme cold.

He hesitated momentarily, standing knee deep in yet another snowbank. Remy scrubbed at his eyes with a gloved hand, trying to clear them of the cold induced tears obscuring his vision. He peered about the immense landscape seeing nothing but snow, more snow, and yet more snow.

Remy sighed, his breath turning to mist the moment it hit the air. "Of all the places Rogue could have dumped me in, she just had to choose Antarctica..." he said sourly with chattering teeth.

After a moment rubbing at his arms in a futile attempt to warm up, Remy continued on his torturous journey through the snow.

His joints ached with the cold, and every step he managed to complete took more of him that a Danger Room session. Tired, hungry, and physically exhausted, Remy finally collapsed into the snow. Laying on his back, he stared up into the clear sky, unable to force himself back onto his aching feet.

"Well, what do we have here?" a jolly sounding voice exclaimed, making Remy's eyes roll wildly in surprise. He tried to heft himself into a sitting position to see who had managed to sneak up on him in the wide open area he had been trudging through.

He need not have bothered trying, for a moment later, the man was leaning over him and Remy put a face to the voice.

"Mon Dieu..." he breathed.

The bearded man smiled, his bright blue eyes twinkling merrily. "I'm afraid you're thinking of the wrong story, my dear boy," he said calmly. He reached out with a mittened hand and hefted Remy to his feet with astonishing ease.

"I think I'm going insane..." Remy muttered, leaning against his plump rescuer.

"You can call me Santa," he said, ignoring Remy's mumbled protest. "Come along now, let's go get you someplace warm." Holding Remy up with arms strengthened by years of lifting heavy bags overflowing with toys, Santa led the frozen mutant towards their transportation.

Remy blinked unbelievingly as he took in the sight of the sled parked a short distance away from them. A sled with reindeer. Reindeer led by one with an astonishingly bright, blinking red nose.

Paying no heed to Remy's inarticulate mumblings, Santa lifted him into the sled and carefully settled him onto the passengers seat. That done, he climbed into his own seat with a grace surprising from one of his size. "Off we go, Rudolph!" Santa exclaimed cheerfully, settling back into his cushion covered seat as the reindeer thrust up into the air.

Fighting back his sense of disbelief in his situation, Remy turned to Santa. "Thank you for rescuing me," he said politely.

"It's a good thing that Mrs. Santa asked me to take the reindeer out for a spin, or you'd probably still be laying in that snowbank, young man," he shook his head, his eyes expression clearly saying 'kids these days!'

"I thought that you lived in the North Pole," he said, rather than respond to Santa's unspoken comment.

"Too commercial these days," Santa replied with a 'Ho Ho Ho,' that sent his belly trembling like a bowl full of jelly. When his laughter had stopped, Santa addressed Remy once again. "If you're going to be staying with us, I think it would be appropriate if you were to tell me your name."

"Gambit... Remy LeBeau."

Santa nodded and fished around in the voluminous pockets of his cheerfully bright red coat. He pulled out a list, carefully checking it twice. "Your the one who asked for lockpicks when he was eight," Santa said reminiscently before shaking his head sternly. "You've been a naughty boy recently," he commented sadly.

"So I've been told."

"It's always such a shame to see one of mine go naughty," Santa continued, tucking the list back into his pocket. "But no matter. I can tell that naughty just isn't your thing."

"Wish you were there to tell Rogue that..."

With flying reindeer, the trip was mercifully short. Within minutes, they had pulled up at a structure that would have put Xavier's to shame.

"Kris!" a plump white haired woman exclaimed as she caught sight of Remy. "What do you have here?"

"Mary, this is Remy, he'll be staying with us for a while," Santa said as his clucking spouse helped Remy out of the sleigh.

"My poor dear, you're freezing!" Mrs. Claus exclaimed. "And terribly thin. I'll just have to do something about that," she said with determination. "Kris, tuck in the reindeer, and I'll go get some warm clothing for our guest and get some nice, filling stew into him."

With that, Mrs. Claus tugged Remy through the doors into their house.

They were met just inside the door by a young woman in a modest white dress who had hair as red as Jean's. Her blue eyes widened as she caught sight of Mrs. Claus and Remy. "Oh mommy!" she gushed. "It's a man!" she smiled at Remy and flittered her eyelashes.

"He's not for you, Holly. He's a stray."

"Can we keep him? Please?"

"No, dear. I'm sure his family is out looking for him. Now shoo! I've got to get the poor boy fattened up."

Remy was all too eager to follow Mrs. Claus and to get away from Holly Claus.

Santa leaned back in his chair, rubbing at his belly contentedly.  "Mary, my dear, I do believe that this is the best meal that you've ever made" he complimented his flushing wife.

"Thank you, dear," she replied, dropping a kiss on his rosy cheeks while placing another slice of chocolate cake on his plate.

Further down the table, Holly leaned closer to Remy, her hand draping over his. "So, Remy, tell me all about you," she cooed.

Across the table, Jingle the elf, head of the toy making division and second in importance only to Santa glared at Remy.

Great, another love triangle, Remy thought, glancing between Holly and Jingle. He carefully extracted his hand from Holly's and discreetly scooted away. "I'm sure that you really don't want to --"

Santa's booming voice cut through Remy's sentence. "Remy, my boy. We surely have enjoyed having you with us for this past few weeks, but I'm afraid that it's time that you be going home."

Jingle grinned, Holly pouted, and Remy sighed in relief.

"I'll drop you off at your home during my Christmas rounds," he stated.

"Thank you, Santa," Remy replied.

"This one's for you, Rogue," Scott told the sad-eyed young woman, gesturing towards the large box situated slightly to the side of the tree.

She shook her head. "I don't want it," she sniffled.

Lord, give me strength, he silently prayed. "Open. The. Box." he demanded, determined to get the moping mutant to open at least one present that day.

The other X-Men turned to watch as Rogue grumbled and moved to open the box. It tore open in short order, and Rogue peered in.

"It sure took you long enough to open the box," Remy groused from his scrunched up position inside the box, pulling styrofoam pellets from his hair.

Rogue's eyes rolled back in her head and she bonelessly collapsed to the floor.

"Merry Christmas, chere!" Remy called out after her as the assembled mutants looked at the box in shock.

"Now, would someone mind getting me out of here...?"




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